My Uncle Is A Southern Planter. He's

He Always Had A Chip On His Shoulder That He Was Ready To Use To Kindle An Argument.

Life, In My Estimation, Is A Biological Misadventure That We Terminate On The Shoulders Of Six Strange Men Whose Only Objective Is To Make A Hole In One With You.

Television Is A Triumph Of Equipment Over People, And The Minds That Control It Are So Small That You Could Put Them In A Gnat's Navel With Room Left Over For Two Caraway Seeds And An Agent's Heart.

My Father Never Raised His Hand To Any One Of His Children, Except In Self-defense.

There Are Two Kinds Of Jokes - Funny Jokes And Jack Benny Jokes.