List of John Cleese Quotes

Everything In Comedy's Got To Be Exactly Right, Which Is Why Making A Comedic Film Is Kind Of A Difficult Process, Because, For Most Of The Two Years Of Shooting It And Editing It And Reshooting And All Of That, It's Not Quite Right. And It's Only When You Just At The End, You Put The Final Polish On It, It Becomes Really Funny Again.

When People Quote Sketches To Me, Half The Time I Don't Know What They're Talking About So I Have To Sort Of Go, Aha, Yes, Oh Yep, I Remember That And Lie My Way Out Of It.

Nerves Are Always A Big Problem For Me, Which Is Why I Loved Doing American Sitcoms. Because You Know When You Do The Take In Front Of The Audience That You're Going To Do It Again Afterwards. A Minute After You Finish, You Just Go And Do It Again. So, There's That Sort Of Safety Net. And Then If You Made A Little Mistake Or Two, They'll Go Pick It Up, So There's Nothing To Worry About.

That's A Lovely Experience When You Make An Audience Laugh. Then The Nerves Go Away For A Bit. And Sometimes You Do Things Then That You've Never Done Before That Are Really Funny.

The Great Thing About Florida Is You - Each City's About Two Hours' Drive From Everywhere Else.

British Press Think Entirely In Clichés, And When They Do Come Across Creative Work, They Think That It Must Be Based On Something, Because They Don't Realize That You Can Create Things That Aren't Based On Things.

Although I Had Good Hand-eye Coordination, I Was So Tall And Skinny And Muscularly Weak That I Just Was Not Well Coordinated. But What I Started To Do Quite Early On Was Watch Some Of The Great Old Silent Comedians, Like Laurel And Hardy And Chaplin, And Then Later On Harold Lloyd And Buster Keaton.

The British Fans Are Liable To Suddenly Be Talking To You About Something That You Don't Know How You Got Into The Conversation. I Think It's Something To Do With The Fact That They've Been Watching You For So Many Years Sort Of You Telling Your Story.

What I've Always Wanted To Do Is Be As Funny As Possible.

I've Always Called Myself A Writer/performer, Not An Actor Because I Basically Write What I Perform.

I Could Take An Umbrella And Balance It On My Chin Or On My Foot. And I Just Got Interested In That Kind Of Thing. And As I Played Games More And More And Got Stronger Physically, I Just Became More Coordinated.

What Have The Romans Ever Done For Us?