You Know, Before I Would Think, My

My Wife Gets So Jealous. She Came Home From Work And Was Mad At Me Because There Was A Pretty Girl On The Bus She Thought I Would Have Liked.

I Love Hitting Into The Rough Because It Gets Me Close To The People.

People Think Living In Your Parents' Basement Until You're Twenty-nine Is Lame. But What They Don't Realize Is That While You're There, You Save Money On Rent, Food, And Dates.

I'm Now Unemployed. It's A Weird Feeling With No Work, But At Least There's Still Golf. Standup Comedy Is Like My Core, It's What I Do. But I Want To Be A Pro Golfer. It's A Love/hate Relationship With Golf. I Can Come Away Feeling So Serene, And Yet, It's The Thing That I Can Let Get To Me To Throw A Club And Say Curses That Don't Even Exist. I'm Obsessed With Something That Won't Let Me Master It. I Don't Know. I Need Therapy.

I Had To Be Naked [in Vinyl], But I Was Almost More Nervous About Having To Be Drunk. The Director Wasn't Going To Yell, "too Big!," During The Nude Scene. For The Drunk Scene, You Can Be Bad Drunk Or Good Drunk. We'll See. My Wife Was Not Happy, Hearing About It.