Sex Hasn't Been The Same Since Women

Baptists Never Make Love Standing Up. They're Afraid Someone Might See Them And Think They're Dancing.

The Only Way That I Could Figure They Could Improve Upon Coca-cola, One Of Life's Most Delightful Elixirs, Which Studies Prove Will Heal The Sick And Occasionally Raise The Dead, Is To Put Bourbon In It.

Life Is Like A Dogsled Race. If You Ain't The Lead Dog, The Scenery Never Changes.

The Game Of Life Is A Lot Like Football. You Have To Tackle Your Problems, Block Your Fears, And Score Your Points When You Get The Opportunity.

On A New York Subway You Get Fined For Spitting, But You Can Throw Up For Nothing.