Never Ask Your Wife If She Still

As Long As I Don't Commit Any Crimes, You Have No Right To Judge Me Except By My Performance As A Professional. On That Level, You're Welcome To Think Whatever You Want About Me.

Do You Know My Dream? I Really Want To Become An Aluminum-siding Salesman.

Never Ask Your Wife If She Still Hears From Her Old Pimp.

How Much Of The National News That You Report To The Public Each Night Consists Of Information You've Actually Gone Out And Dug Up On Your Own?

I Wouldn't Have The Slightest Interest In Running For Public Office. I'd Rather Make Jokes About Politicians Than Become One Of Them.