Sixty Years Ago This Week Hitler Invaded

More Details Coming Out About Michael Jackson. It Seems His 13-year-old Accuser Testified Before A Grand Jury That Michael Had Seven Locks On His Bedroom Door. See, What Happened Was Whenever Michael Would Install One Lock, The Kid Would Grow An Inch Taller, And He'd Have To Put In Another One, And Then Another One, And Then Another One.

President Bush Said He Was 'troubled' By Gay People Getting Married In San Francisco. He Said On Important Issues Like This The People Should Make The Decision, Not Judges. Unless Of Course We're Choosing A President, Then He Prefers Judges.

President Bush Earned $400,000 For His Job As President Last Year. That's Not Really That Much For Being President When You Think About It. But President Bush, He Doesn't Do It For The Money, He Does It For The Eight Months Of Vacation Every Year.

President Obama Wants To Raise Taxes On The Country's Richest People. And You Thought Donald Trump Hated Him Before.

Usain Bolt Won The Gold For The Men's 100- And 200-meter Dashes For The Second Olympics In A Row. You Know, He Has Been Running Since He Was In Elementary School - Kind Of Like Mitt Romney.