I've Learned To Have Absolutely No Regrets

My Sex Life Is So Bad, My G-spot Has Been Declared A Historical Landmark.

I Was The Last Girl In Larchmont, Ny To Get Married. My Mother Had A Sign Up: "last Girl Before Freeway."

I’ve Had So Much Plastic Surgery, When I Die They Will Donate My Body To Tupperware.

I Said To My Husband, 'why Don't You Call Out My Name When We're Making Love?' He Said, 'i Don't Want To Wake You Up.'

Al Roker Said I Am 80 Years 'young'; It's Like Saying Al Roker Is 320 Pounds 'thin'.