I Prefer The Earlier Birth Control Techniques,

I've Rarely Said The Word "lord," Unless It's Followed By "of The Rings.

I've Never Before Been So Aware Of The Thousands Of Little Good Things, The Thousands Of Things That Go Right Every Day.

Let Me Tell You, Though: Being The Smartest Boy In The World Wasn’t Easy. I Didn’t Ask For This. I Didn’t Want This. On The Contrary, It Was A Huge Burden. First, There Was The Task Of Keeping My Brain Perfectly Protected. My Cerebral Cortex Was A National Treasure, A Masterpiece Of The Sistine Chapel Of Brains. This Was Not Something That Could Be Treated Frivolously. If I Could Have Locked It In A Safe, I Would Have. Instead, I Became Obsessed With Brain Damage.

Think Of Negative Speech As Verbal Pollution. And That's What I've Been Doing: Visualizing Insults And Gossip As A Dark Cloud, Maybe One With Some Sulfur Dioxide. Once You've Belched It Out, You Can't Take It Back. As Grandma Said, If You Don't Have Anything Nice To Say, Don't Say Anything At All. The Interesting This Is, The Less Often I Vocalize My Negative Thoughts, The Fewer Negative Thoughts I Cook Up In The First Place.

After Decimating Several Vegetables, I Decide Juicing Is My Favorite Form Of Food Preparation. There's Something Perversely Appealing About Subjecting An Innocent Plant To That Much Violence.