I Learned Over The Years That It's

Never Hit Anyone In Anger, Unless You're Absolutely Sure You Can Get Away With It.

My Characters Aren't Losers. They're Rebels. They Win By Their Refusal To Play By Everyone Else's Rules.

We Tell Our Kids That Policemen Are Good And God Protects Us And Our Country Is Noble, And At A Certain Point - And For Some It Comes Quite Early, Five Or Six Years Old - We Start To Realize That It's All A Facade.

Billy Crystal Knows How To Make People Laugh. He's Got 30 Years On Stage... There's No Telling Him What's Funny.

I'm A Writer-director-actor, Which I've Always Kind Of Enjoyed. I Compared It To The Olympic Biathlon. "not Only Can He Cross-country Ski, But He's A Terrific Marksman As Well." I Want People To Say, "you Mean That Writer Performed A Tracheotomy?" That's Right, I Do Everything.