[writing A Joke] There Is No Team

Democrats Have Been Doing Everything They Can To Get Young People And College Students To Vote In The Midterms. Though If You Want Students To Participate In Something, Maybe You Shouldn't Call Them Midterms.

I'm Not A Big Baseball Fan, To Be Honest.

Jeb Bush's Brother Neil Said That Their Mother Has 'come Around' To The Idea Of Jeb Running For President In 2016. Because If There's Anything That Says You're Qualified To Be President, It's Your Own Mom Saying, 'i Guess You Could Do It.'

Don't Keep Reaching For The Stars Because You'll Just Look Like An Idiot Stretching That Way For No Reason.

A Peacock Escaped From The Central Park Zoo And Wandered Around The City. Either That Or I Just Saw A Pigeon On His Way To A Gay Pride Parade.