When Watering Your Plants, Try To Talk

Vampires Probably Don't Have Great Breath.

I Was Eating Some Candy And Looked On The Wrapper, And It Said Made From Natural And Artificial Flavors. You Could Just Say Flavors.

Parades Are Man's Attempt To Make Traffic Exciting.

I Was Stuck In Traffic And I Looked In The Mirror And In The Car Behind Me There Was A Couple Having A Horrible Argument And Right Below Their Image It Said "objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear". I Just Thought, Man I Hope So Because She Was Pretty Mad.

One Thing I Learned Is That It's Never Ok To Walk Through A Cemetery Dressed As A Mummy - Even If That Was A Shortcut On The Way To The Costume Party.