When Things Are Bad, It's The Best

I Want To Tell You About A Woman I Have Been Married To For Ten Years, My Wife, Ann, Who Speaking Truthfully, Saved Me From Myself. Who Saved Me From Destroying Myself Because Of My Background. Who Saved Me From Wasting My Life, Drinking My Life Away, Never Fulfilling My Dreams Because Of What I Had Come From, And Truly Believing And Loving - Truly The First Person To Ever Truthfully, Unconditionally Love Me.

I Think It's Easier For African American And White Comics To Be Praised Than It Is Latinos Because They Think Our Culture Or Our Humor Is Substandard. I Mean, I Just Don't Think They Want To Give Us Credit. I Just Don't Think That They See Us As Important Enough To Be At Their Level. I'm The Longest-produced Comedy At Warner Bros. And I Don't Feel Special. They Come Over And Say Hello. But Everybody's Gonna Make A Lot Of Money And I Don't Feel Like I'm Special To Them.

I'm A Big Fan Of Reality Shows. I Thought The First One, Dukes Of Hazzard, Captured White People Perfectly.

It's An Honor To Walk In The Footsteps Of A Legend. As Host I Intend To Honor The Tradition Of The Bob Hope Classic And Have A Great Time Blazing A New Path.

As Latinos, You Want [people] To Come To America - Not Necessarily Latinos, But [anyone Who Wants] To Come Here For A Better Life. That's Kind Of How This Country Was Founded And The History Of This Country.