The Great Thing About Being A Novelist

Oh, This Shouldn't Be Allowed. There Should Be A Rule Which Says That People You've Met In The Gym Should Never Meet You In Real Life.

I Can't Get Over This. Dad Isn't Sam's Dad? Dad Is A Friend? How Was I Supposed To Know That? People Shouldn't Be Allowed To Sign Themselves As Dad Unless They Are Your Dad. It Should Be The Law.

A Man Will Never Love You Or Treat You As Well As A Store. If A Man Doesn't Fit, You Can't Exchange Him Seven Days Later For A Gorgeous Cashmere Sweater. And A Store Always Smells Good. A Store Can Awaken A Lust For Things You Never Even Knew You Needed. And When Your Fingers First Grasp Those Shiny, New Bags...

Ciao," I Say Casually, And Flick My Hair Back. "si. Ciao." I Could So Be Italian. Except I Might Have To Learn A Few More Words.

Christmas Shopping! I Can Do All My Christmas Shopping Here! I Know March Is A Bit Early, But Why Not Be Organized? And Then When Christmas Arrives I Won't Have To Go Near The Horrible Christmas Crowds.