Stars Today Are Just Masturbation Images.

Movies Bore Me; Especially My Own.

How Do I Keep Fit? I Lay Down A Lot.

Sure I Was Glad To See John Wayne Win The Oscar I'm Always Glad To See The Fat Lady Win The Cadillac On Tv, Too.

I Never Take Any Notice Of Reviews - Unless A Critic Has Thought Up Some New Way Of Describing Me. That Old One About My Lizard Eyes And Anteater Nose And The Way I Sleep My Way Through Pictures Is So Hackneyed Now.

I Started Out To Be A Sex Fiend, But I Couldn't Pass The Physical.