Religion Is Bad And Drugs Are Good.

There's No Greater Model, In My View, Than Jesus Christ.

Today Obama Was Seen Leaving The White House In A Nurse's Uniform On A Flight To Cuba To Smother Castro With A Pillow.

The President Boasted At The Top Of His Press Conference That We Have The Support Now Of Britain And Spain For Our Attack On Iraq. You Know, When You Want To Make It Perfectly Clear To The World That You're Not An Imperialist, The People You Want In Your Corner Are Britain And Spain.

I Was Just At The Newly Opened Creationist Museum In Kentucky.... And They Have This Exhibit Of A Giant Dinosaur...with A Saddle On Its Back. Because The World Is Only 5000 Years Old, So Man And The Dinosaurs Had To Coexist, And, Of Course, We Rode Them. A Theory I Thought Laughable At The Age Of Eight When I Saw It On The Flintstones!

It's All Been Satirized For Your Protection.