Obama Better Hope A Kicked Ass Is

Bad Television Is Three Things: A Bullet Train To A Morally Bankrupt Youth, A Slow Spiral Into An Intellectual Void, And Of Course, A Complete Blast To Watch.

I Would Call The French Scumbags, But That, Of Course, Would Be A Disservice To Bags Filled With Scum. I Say We Invade Iraq, Then Invade Chirac.

We Are Simultaneously The Most Hated, Loved, Feared And Admired Nation On This Planet. In Short, We Are Frank Sinatra.

I Had Fun Pretending To Be A Sportscaster. People Always Think That Was A Down Thing For Me. I Had The Best Job In Sports Broadcasting For Two Years.

Twitter! Never Have Lives Been Less Lived And More Chronicled!