My Tastes In All Things Lean Towards

You Can't Write A Children's Book That Takes More Than Five Or Six Minutes To Read, Because It Will Drive The Parents Batty. It Has To Be Compact. Nobody Thinks About The Parents When They Write These Stupid Books. I Could Write Longer Children's Books, But It Would Actually Be Bad If I Did.

I Think People Hate Me Pretty Much Across The Board, Which Is Nice.

I'm Very Introverted, So It Requires A Huge Effort For Me To Put On A Smile And Extend A Hand And Accept Compliments. I Would Much Rather Be Insulted Than Complimented Any Day.

When You're Writing Something, And You're Putting Yourself Out There, Or You're Performing And Someone Comes In And Savages That, Then Of Course It Feels Personal. It Doesn't Feel Like It's Just Business, Because There's No Business - It's Not Like We're Conducting Business, This Anonymous Critic And I. It's Just That This Person Is Tearing Me A New Asshole.

My Process Is Surprisingly Straightforward. I Find Myself With Little To Do Over A Stretch Of Time And I Say, "i Should Write Children's Books Today." Then I Sit Down And Write A Children's Book, And If It Takes More Than, Realistically, Three Hours, I Feel Like I've Done Something Wrong.