It's The Less Bright Students Who Make

Occasionally Indulging In A Do-nothing Day Is More Than Worth The Price.

Where You're From Only Matters In Relation To Where You Are.

The Palm Is A Joint For Sadists To Entertain Masochists.

Speaking Of Birthdays, Our Firstborn [recently Turned 2]. As Parents Sometimes Fondly Do, We Reminisced A Bit About His Early Days On Earth-the Excitement, The Wonder, The Fears When We Brought Him Home. His Every Squeak Or Squawk We Were Sure Heralded Some Terrible Crisis; I Tested The Warmth Of Formulas From Dusk To Dawn, It Seemed. We Were So Germ-conscious My Wife Even Sterilized The Skin Of The Oranges Before Squeezing Them. How Firstborns Ever Survive Their Parents' Attentions Is Beyond Me. However, They Do, And He Did, And, In Spite Of Our Efforts, He Turned Out To Be Quite A Good Guy.

What Advertising Dum-dum Signed Up Ilie Nastase To Sell A Resort?! Who'd Want To Go Where He's At?