A Straw Enables You To Drink Without

I Tend To Avoid Televisions, Politics, And Places With Velvet Ropes.

I Think Bears And Worms Aren't Very Similar... Until You Think Of Gummy.

They Should Call Fishing What It Really Is... Tricking And Killing!

Man Versus Woman Equals Fun. Man Versus Man Equals Gay. Woman Versus Woman Equals Awesome. Man Versus Pillow Equals Crazy. Pillow Versus Pillow Equals Crazy Awesome - That's A Real Pillow Fight Right There. You See Two Pillows Fighting, You Know Something's Going Down. They're Designed For Relaxation. If They're Fighting, What Hope Do We Have? One Time I Saw Two Geese Fighting, And I Was Like, 'this Is A Pillow Fight Ahead Of Time.

I Think Hair Gel Was Invented To Make It Easier To Identify Assholes From A Distance.